Maybe Tomorrow


Yesterday I committed to starting my new exercises for my knee. Unfortunately, it didn’t happen today. I woke up early this morning and got my morning stuff out of the way, tacked on my reading and my learning, and fairly soon after that went back to bed. (I really need to redistribute my daily meds to see if I can avoid loading so many meds with drowsiness as a side effect in the morning.) I slept for a while, then woke up and started reading my current novel for a while, and soon after that my wife came home for lunch. Then I dropped her off at her office and spent the biggest part of the rest of the afternoon wrapped up with therapy and the commute there and back. It wasn’t long after I got back home that I got a call from my wife. I needed to pick her up early. The bloodwork she had done on Monday at the ENT came back positive for mono, and her office wanted her to stay home until her doctors cleared her to return. She had tried to talk them into letting her work from home, but in the end they said that they wouldn’t allow it.

We went to the doctor straight from work to go pick up a note telling her she’s cleared to return to work on Monday. And I’ve spent the rest of the evening taking care of her, as it kind of hit her all at once and she’s been exhausted all day.

There will be rest for the next few days. In the meantime, I’ll try to get back on the exercise bandwagon tomorrow.


Random Thoughts 5/30/2017


Today is the last day of my wife’s staycation. She took Friday and Tuesday off because we were planning on going out of town for the weekend, but her strep kept us home. So we’ve been taking it easy for days, just hanging out at home.

It’s been fun having her home. I love her company and we have fun together. I prefer her company to anyone else’s. She gets me, and I get her. Tomorrow’s going to be lonely without her.

Went to go get an MRI done on my knee tonight. Results will go to my orthopedist and my general practitioner, and I’ll hear back from the orthopedist on the 6th during my follow-up visit. I’m a little nervous. I expected this to be a fairly simple case where I’d be sent home with exercises to do to strengthen the joint and the muscles in it. But now with my kneecap broken, there’s no telling what else could be wrong in there.

It’s been some time since I’ve reported anything to do with my mental illnesses and my progress on them. Doesn’t really feel like I’ve made any progress lately, but realistically I know that I can’t always be moving forward. It’s fine for me to be pretty stationary, mentally speaking. Feeling like I’m in a rut means that I’m not regressing, so that’s a good thing. Hopefully I can start making some headway soon. I feel like I’m stagnating.


Seventeen Years Ago …


Today is a special day. Seventeen years ago today I met these two girls. One of them took an immediate fancy to me, and the feeling was mutual. The other was her friend, and I thought she was nice. Before the weekend was over I had both of their numbers, each for a different reason.

The mutual attraction wound up being a fling, but the friend and I started hitting it off as she was going through a rough spot in her marriage, and making the decision to end it. Since I didn’t know him, I offered her an objective ear while she vented about the troubles she was having. It wasn’t long before we were on the phone talking for hours at a time. We lived three hours away from one another, so there wasn’t much of an opportunity for face to face time over coffee, but we did talk about pretty much everything. Before we knew it, there was a mutual attraction growing there as well. Her divorce went through, and eventually we made the decision to try dating, and that led to a months-long series of three hour trips between towns on the weekends. That in turn led to us moving in together.

She was always very clear that she didn’t want to get married again, but eventually she changed her mind on that. I asked her to marry me in front of 400 people and the rest, as they say, is history.

Today is the seventeenth anniversary of the day I met the woman that would become my wife. It’s been a bumpy road in places, but I cannot imagine spending the last seventeen years of my life – and all the rest to come – without her by my side.

I love you dearly, Stacy, more than there are stars – and until they all go out.

November 28, 2014: Three Good Things


As I promised my Facebook followers, I am moving this regular post here to my blog and letting WordPress promote it back to Facebook. At the end of the day, I list three good things that happened during the day. This gives me a positive thing to look back on if I ever think my life isn’t anything but pain and suffering.

Today’s good things:

1. My wife came home early from work, and I got to spend an extra hour and a half with her today that I wouldn’t normally be able to during the week.

2. I realized (and wrote about, in another post) that my checklist, when complete, is essentially giving me permission to go to bed when my brain is insisting that I do otherwise. On days like today, it’s especially important that I try to get everything checked off so I don’t feel like I’m missing anything by not staying up.

3. This is the one I’ve been waiting all day to talk about. Today I took the plunge and applied for financial aid to go back to school for my associate’s degree in social work. It will help me with my stated goal of returning to the workforce as a peer support specialist, plus it opens the door for a job as a caseworker and furthers the possibility of pursuing a higher education. I don’t know if I’m ready. I’ve spent almost thirty years of my adult life asking myself that question. I’m tired of asking and wondering. It’s time to DO.