Fighting the Heat


Today we went to a laundromat to do laundry because of the sheer amount that we have, as well as the fact that we have a quilt that needed to be washed. By the time that we wrapped up the laundry around noon or so, it was almost 100 degrees outside, and we had spent over an hour in a badly air conditioned large room filled with washers and dryers and people. We were warm, to the point of nearly overheating. We came home, brought some of the clothes upstairs with us, and fought to cool off.

That process took us over an hour, despite stripping down to underwear and pointing a fan directly at us. For a large part of the afternoon the thermostat in our apartment read 80, and I don’t recall having heard the air conditioning shutting off at all today.

Neither my wife nor I do well in the heat. We’ve both gotten heatsick on multiple occasions before, and that means that we’re both just that much more prone to getting sick again. It doesn’t take much time out in the heat to really do a number on our energy level. Simply going from door to car and car to door is enough to have an effect on us; what we did today in the heat was something neither of us were really prepared for.

It’s taken us until this evening to recover from our adventure, and we still have work left to do to put clothes away. I’m already exhausted and I don’t know where I’m going to get the energy to finish the laundry tonight. I know my wife feels pretty much the same.

Tomorrow, hopefully, the maintenance crew will stop by and replace the air filter. It’s in need, and I think that’s a big reason why our AC isn’t more effective. I hope that the difference will be noticeable.

Is it October yet?

Still Saving Spoons


Today was mostly another take-it-easy kind of day. Tomorrow absolutely won’t be, as we have to pack and make it to the airport, plus I have an appointment a couple hours before we’re due to head out for our trip, so things are going to be crazy. I’m going to be looking forward to getting into Phoenix tomorrow night and collapsing at the hotel room.

So far the only thing on tap that I know about is going to be dinner with the family Wednesday night and the service on Thursday morning. I hope it’s going to be a low-key trip the rest of the way.

I’m still waiting on an issue with one of my characters in Secret World Legends, but I’m spending quite a bit of time on my other two characters. One of them is for all intents and purposes teamed with my wife’s character of the same faction – we have decided to play them together for the duration of the game – and one I’m spending my solo free time on. It’s good to be playing with my wife. We enjoy each other’s company immensely, and we always seem to make a very good team in whatever game we’re playing.

We’ve got a social weekend planned, on top of the trip. There’s a barbecue on Saturday afternoon that we’d like to make an appearance at, and on Sunday afternoon we’re going to a couple of friends’ new-ish place (we haven’t been there yet, so it’s new to us) to visit and help her out with some work stuff. Other than that, I think we’re going to be laying pretty low to conserve what we can for next week.

September 28, 2015: Three Good Things


Been a while. Let’s do this.

1. I went walking today. The good part was the very sweet pit bull that I met on the trail. She came over and let me skritch her for a minute before padding back to her daddy.

2. For the first time in a while, I had the energy to get through the day without a nap.

3. For the first time in months, I hit everything on my daily checklist.

A Surge In Energy


I’ve noticed something interesting about the past two months that really speaks to the nature of depression.

About two months ago, I stopped taking one of my psychiatric medications. The adventure of getting it filled has been a long and well-documented one, but I ran out and through what a comedy of errors only recently got it refilled.

Whether because of the missing medication and its reintroduction into my regimen, or due to a completely circumstantial and coincidental instance of timing, my mood and energy level tanked almost right around the time I ran out of this medication. I could barely get out of bed, and while I made a point of at least taking my meds during this time, there were a couple of days that I didn’t even want to bother with that.

I’ve slept more in the past two months than I think I have during any two month period in my adulthood. But that brings up the point I wish to make.

There were several times during that period that my mood was quite bright, even downright happy, even though my energy level was still practically non-existent. I might have been enjoying life, but I was mostly enjoying it from the bedroom, barely able to lift a finger to do anything close to my usual daily activities.

Again, timed with the reintroduction of the medication into my regimen, my energy level has been slowly increasing over the past couple of weeks, which leads me to this point in my life.

Today I decided that I actually had enough energy to try and accomplish everything that’s on my checklist of things to do. And so far, things have gone well. My checklists are organized more or less chronologically, and I’m up to date with the things that I should have done up to this point. Still have the end-of-day things that usually trip me up left to do, but from this point it should be smooth sailing.

I’m excited about this. It proves to myself that I am capable of functioning at baseline again, something I haven’t been able to do without forcing myself to do it for almost two months.

It also continues to drive home the point that the scale between mania and depression isn’t so much mood-based as much as energy-based, at least for me. Certainly my mood is down as my energy wanes, and as I have more energy my mood tends to improve to match. But I think that the energy leads the way in this equation in many instances. I certainly am not suggesting that drinking a four-pack of Red Bull is the key to avoiding depression; quite the reverse. It seems to be the amount of energy that my body can naturally generate that leads the way to a better or worse mood, but I know of many instances in the past where my mood tanked well before my energy level.

What I will offer is that I believe that mood and energy are intertwined, and when one is higher, the other will tend to follow.

Let’s see how the rest of the day pans out and if it goes well, I’ll be back on later to talk about today’s three good things before bed.