Lethargic Despite Intentions

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I woke up this morning intending to be a spitfire, full of energy for whatever the day had in store for me.

By 10:30 I was back in bed.

I suppose that I should explain something at this point in the ongoing lethargy topic that I bring up frequently here. It’s taken a long time for me to get to the point where I would listen to what my body tells me to do. If I was hungry, I’d ignore it; if I was in pain, I wouldn’t take anything for it; if I was tired or fatigued, I’d push myself to stay awake because I might miss something. I still get like that, but those instances are fewer and further between nowadays. If I’m hungry, I’ll get up and feed myself. If I have a headache or backache, I’ll either take something for the pain (head) or pull out the heating pad (back). And if my body is telling me it’s fatigued, I’m much more apt to listen to it and go rest.

Now, a lot of time I’m in bed for maybe an hour, sometimes more, sometimes less. I catch enough of a nap to recharge me for a little while, and eventually I get past that fatigue and into the “awake for good” portion, which usually isn’t until later in the afternoon or evening.

The sleep study I did Monday night proved that I have sleep apnea, something we’ve honestly known for years, but never really put much stock into. The care of the machine is insanely complex, the mask fitting never seemed to seal well, and it was difficult for me to get used to it, which all totaled to near complete non-compliance on my part.

That was before I found out that my blood oxygen level was dropping by almost 25% during the night.

No wonder I’m tired – my heart is working overtime to try and get enough oxygen to my body, restful sleep is being interrupted about every ten minutes or so, which means that eight hours of “sleep” is likely translating to maybe four or five hours of “rest” each night.

So for now I’m going to be more accepting of my fatigue and lethargy. There’s not much I can do for it until I get a prescription for a CPAP machine and start using it – regularly.

But the good thing is that it will likely help alleviate my daytime fatigue, reduce my blood pressure to the point that I could potentially come off of some of my medications, and possibly even help me to better manage my diabetes.

I’m still not crazy about the need to sleep attached to a machine, but given the risks without it and the benefits with it, I think I’m finally going to be compliant with its use. And then we’ll see what happens.

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